No sign of her. Nothing. The search had been fruitless. Very very fruitless. Her scent had been nowhere, nowhere at all. She was probably not even in the valley anymore, if she was even still alive. But if she was still alive, then why would she have left and stayed away? Did she not love Brynn anymore? Had the kids become too much for her? Had she found someone else? No, she would never cheat on him, would she? But still…
Brynn could not help but worry. He felt terrible. He couldn’t stop thinking about her. And as he came home, things only got more troubling. The scents of all his pups had faded, as well. Where had Junior and Faithful gone off to? Was Albus still not back home? Why did he go? Courage’s scent was the strongest of all, but it too seemed to be fading. The boy had gone out recently. And not returned yet?
Brynn… snapped. Everyone was leaving him. His mate, his pups. His siblings too. No one ever came back. They all left and no one ever came back! Brynn just… he needed help. He needed someone. Just someone, to tell him everything would be alright. But would it ever be alright again? The wolf he loved was gone, the wolf he had wanted to stay with, for the rest of his life. His pups, all fading, all going their own ways. Not even a year old yet.
He had failed his mate, failed his children. There was no way he could redeem himself. Brynn was a poor excuse of a father, he had been from the start. He should have known, from the moment he set eyes on his newborn pups… the way he felt, back then. He did not feel happy, did not feel proud. He felt scared, and useless. He had been scared, to see his own pups. No happiness. Just a sadness deep down. And he had overcome that sadness, but now… now it was returning, with all these latest events, so much was happening.
And Brynn could not cope.
He could not cope anymore.
He could not.
Eyes fell on the water, the lake. He remembered Lynett, then, and how he tried to teach her how to swim. He wondered where she had gone off to. She had never come back again. Not after that moment he saved her. She had sunk to the bottom of the lake, and Brynn had done his best to pull her up. He had managed. But had it been worth it? Saving that wolf, only to never see her again?
Who knew, maybe she had come back and gone swimming alone and ended up on the bottom, anyway. Maybe Brynn should end up on the bottom.
Maybe Calamity was on the bottom.
Maybe Brynn should go to the bottom.
He did not think anymore at that point. He just walked, moving forward. Stepping into the water. And he did not stop. His legs went under, the water reached up to his belly, to his chest, to his throat, to his muzzle. Muzzle went under, head went under. And Brynn went under.
And he let himself sink. Moving further into the deep. He let himself sink.
His whole family was falling apart and hs mate was gone and his pups were gone and he was a terrible father and everyone was better off without him.
He let himself sink.
Swallowed up by the deep.
Jun 11, 2017 08:32 AM
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